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Monday, July 19, 2010

Purpose of Relationships

Relationships are something I’ve been considering a lot lately. I’ve realized in some I need to step up to the plate more. And in some I need to disengage. Some need repairing. And some need to end.

The quote “no man is an island” is true and you have a purpose in the lives of your family, your friends and other people you know. Relationships are a two way street – you give and you receive. A part of figuring out your purpose is in regards to others is to also know what your purpose is NOT.

As a wife, daughter, sister and aunt I am to support my family. To help them in ways that are healthy for them. To come along side during difficult times. To be a “safe place” for them.

And they should be the same for me.

I know well that in so many situations it just can’t be done. And this is where knowing what your purpose is not is so important. Your purpose is not to be abused in any manner. Your purpose is not to enable harmful behaviors. Sometimes you just have to “love them from a distance”.

To a lesser degree, the same is to be expected for and from a friend. Now mind you, I am not talking about acquaintances or Facebook “friends”. I’m talking about true friendship – a bond that goes past “Hi! How are you?” because they already know how you are.

Then there is ‘everyone else’.

They are in your life for a purpose – for you and for them. But that reason and purpose is quite limited.

A co-worker. A fellow organization member. Friend of a friend. Class mate. Interact within the relationship and enjoy it. But you do not have to go beyond that. Don’t let it become a burden and don’t be burdensome.

And sometimes when you examine it, you’ll find quite a few in the “know them” category are – to be blunt – drama queens and kings who expect you to fulfill their needs without ever feeling compelled to give back.

"Never allow someone to be your priority while you're just their option."

I am finding the relationships that count are so much more meaningful since I have recognized the roles I play in the life of each person I know.


  1. Ya know? I never thought we would become as close as we have. But what a blessing to say we have! You are an addition to the Hunley family. You are the definition of a true friend, and I am so proud to call you mine.

  2. Interesting post. Thanks for sharing those thoughts.

  3. That quote at the end really gives me something to think about. I think I really am an option to some of the people I have made a priority in my life. That is about to change. Thanks for the insight.


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